The Best Quotations


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Jerry SeinfeldMake no mistake about why these babies are here - they are here to replace us.

—  Jerry Seinfeld, 1954-, American comedian

H. Jackson Brown, Jr.Remember that children, marriages, and flower gardens reflect the kind of care they get.

—  H. Jackson Brown, Jr., 1940-, American self-help writer

Bill CosbyHuman beings are the only creatures that allow their children to come back home.

—  Bill Cosby, 1937-, American comedian

Dave BarryTo an adolescent, there is nothing in the world more embarrassing than a parent.

—  Dave Barry, 1947-, American journalist

Bill CosbyI guess the real reason that my wife and I had children is the same reason that Napoleon had for invading Russia: it seemed like a good idea at the time.

—  Bill Cosby, 1937-, American comedian

Albert EinsteinIf you want your children to be intelligent, read them fairy tales. If you want them to be more intelligent, read them more fairy tales.

—  Albert Einstein, 1879-1955, German-Jewish physicist

Arthur SchopenhauerEvery child is in a way a genius; and every genius is in a way a child.

—  Arthur Schopenhauer, 1788-1860, German philosopher

Laurence J PeterTelevision has changed the American child from an irresistible force into an immovable object.

—  Laurence J Peter, 1919-1990, Canadian writer & educator

Mark TwainThe most interesting information come from children, for they tell all they know and then stop.

—  Mark Twain, 1835-1910, American writer

John KennedyChildren ate the world’s most valuable resource and its best hope for the future.

—  John Kennedy, 1917-1963, American President [1961-1963]

G. K. ChestertonFairy tales do not tell children the dragons exist. Children already know that dragons exist. Fairy tales tell children the dragons can be killed.

—  G. K. Chesterton, 1874-1936, English writer & critic

Jean AnouilhAll children are sweet at five. But at twelve they begin to get silly.

—  Jean Anouilh, 1910-1987, French playwright

H. Jackson Brown, Jr.Always kiss your children goodnight, even if they're already asleep.

—  H. Jackson Brown, Jr., 1940-, American self-help writer

Carl SandburgA baby is God's opinion that life should go on.

—  Carl Sandburg, 1878-1967, American poet

Jean CocteauChildren and lunatics cut the Gordian knot which the poet spends his life patiently trying to untie.

—  Jean Cocteau, 1889-1963, French artist

Sigmund FreudChildren are completely egoistic; they feel their needs intensely and strive ruthlessly to satisfy them.

—  Sigmund Freud, 1856-1939, Austrian psychologist, founder of psychoanalysis

Elbert HubbardWhere parents do too much for their children, the children will not do much for themselves.

—  Elbert Hubbard, 1856-1915, American writer

Harry TrumanNothing is more important in our national life than the welfare of our children.

—  Harry Truman, 1884-1972, American President [1945-1953]

Charles DarwinHow paramount the future is to the present when one is surrounded by children.

—  Charles Darwin, 1809-1882, British scientist

Pablo PicassoAll children are artists. The problem is how to remain an artist once he grows up.

—  Pablo Picasso, 1881-1973, Spanish painter

Vladimir LeninGive us the child for eight years and it will be a Bolshevik forever.

—  Vladimir Lenin, 1870-1924, Soviet revolutionary & leader

Walt DisneyI do not make films primarily for children. I make them for the child in all of us, whether we be six or sixty. Call the child "innocence". The worst of us is not without innocence, although buried deeply it might be.

—  Walt Disney, 1901-1966, American businessman & cartoonist

Funny Quotes

Phyllis DillerWe spend the first 12 months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next 12 years teaching them to sit down and shut up.

—  Phyllis Diller, 1917 - 2012, American comedian

Phyllis DillerAlways be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.

—  Phyllis Diller, 1917 - 2012, American comedian

Phyllis DillerI still take the pill. I don't want any more grandchildren.

—  Phyllis Diller, 1917 - 2012, American comedian


Yiddish proverbSmall children don’t let you sleep; big children don’t let you rest.

—  Yiddish proverb

International proverbChildren are poor men's riches.

—  International proverb

Children are a poor man’s wealth.

—  Danish Proverb

Movie Quotes

The Sound of Music (1965)The Von Trapp children don't play. They march.

—  from the film The Sound of Music (1965)


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